Oh, Poopie, daaarling......

I fear this will bite me in the butt. Oops. I forgot. We say "tooshie" or "bootie" because apparently toddler boys throw the word butt around with the inflection of the coarsest sailor. Sad, because I've previously used butt as an endearing term of affection. "You silly butt, Oh look at your cute little butt, Get your butt out of my way," and well, I think my point is made.

Now, I don't dare say the butt word in front of Nathaniel for fear he'll go into preschool the next day challenging his little friends with such taunts as "stupid butt" and "smelly butt."

Oh, yeah, and speaking of "stupid," let me digress. Our household had to instate a rule with subclauses regarding that one. He can call objects stupid but not people or animals or anything remotely sentient. I, of course, use the word stupid to describe people all the time (even myself). But, I'd like to think my advanced age has given me the grace and maturity to know how to handle such a powerful adjective. Mostly, though, I just don't want him horrifying his teachers at school. That's what 85% of the language rules come down to. Do NOT say anything that will make your teachers frown upon you and and, by extension, ME!

So, you might sympathize with me this evening. I was tired and a little cranky, but my kid soon softened me up by being adorable. We were having fun playing and, in that vulnerable and compromised state, I allowed a new game to be introduced between us. He calls me Poopie and I call him PeePee. Oh, yes, yes....it was hysterical and we both laughed and laughed...yes, good times....

Until reality hit me and I was all ready seeing him clearly at school the next day. "Poopie! You're Poopie! Heeheehee. Poopie Poopie PeePee. You're PeePee."

Reacting swiftly, I sat my son down and had the very surreal conversation with him about the "you're PeePee and I'm Poopie" being our private game that we only play at home. Which seems potentially a little creepy or weird.