Another good piece of advice from Doctor Youngblood was a warning about trying to avoid living "parallel" lives with Nathaniel. He pointed out how under even normal circumstances that happens so easily....you're doing your thing while he's off playing with his cars or watching a show....but add to that suddenly becoming a single mom and you really have to start watching it.
There's so much to do. How can I do it all and still be spending time enough truly WITH my child?
One suggestion Youngblood had was to incorporate Nathaniel into what it is I am doing. Let him help make dinner, set the table, etc. This also ties into his advice to get Nathaniel to bed a normal hour because that way some of these things I feel I need to get done I can do after he's down for the night.
I still catch myself all the time falling into that parallel existence, but more and more I try to be conscious of it enough to bring our paths back together. Tonight was an example. I put on Polar Express for him to watch. Having seen it already myself, I had planned to stick a Romantic Comedy into my laptop, put on some headphones, and sit with him on the couch while he watched his movie and me mine. Well, it didn't take five minutes for me to realize I couldn't do that. He was so taken with that movie, he talked and made observations about it all the way through. So I quickly set my headphones aside, relaxed, and turned myself over to the Polar Express. And, as it turned out, it was well worth a second viewing, particularly when shared with someone seeing it for the first time. Then it's magic.
There's so much to do. How can I do it all and still be spending time enough truly WITH my child?
One suggestion Youngblood had was to incorporate Nathaniel into what it is I am doing. Let him help make dinner, set the table, etc. This also ties into his advice to get Nathaniel to bed a normal hour because that way some of these things I feel I need to get done I can do after he's down for the night.
I still catch myself all the time falling into that parallel existence, but more and more I try to be conscious of it enough to bring our paths back together. Tonight was an example. I put on Polar Express for him to watch. Having seen it already myself, I had planned to stick a Romantic Comedy into my laptop, put on some headphones, and sit with him on the couch while he watched his movie and me mine. Well, it didn't take five minutes for me to realize I couldn't do that. He was so taken with that movie, he talked and made observations about it all the way through. So I quickly set my headphones aside, relaxed, and turned myself over to the Polar Express. And, as it turned out, it was well worth a second viewing, particularly when shared with someone seeing it for the first time. Then it's magic.
